How much of what happens in our lives do we actually control?
That’s the question of the day. One of our basic human needs is a sense of control, to
know that we have a choice, that our actions make a difference (Dreher, 2019). We are in control
of our lives from the moment that we are born. We might not grasp it until later in life, but you
are still in control. Decisions are what drive your control in life and they are either good
decisions or bad decisions. In our childhood years, our parents exercise guidance over our
control. You are still in control but, your parents are there to educate and guide you down life’s
path of good decision making and not bad ones. This allows us to learn and grow through the
early years in life. Let’s take a look at the early years of basic decision making, and how that can
lead you to the later years in life, and the decision you make throughout your life, is why you are
and where you are at in that moment.
A male and a female join together as one to make a baby. Then the baby is born around 9
months later to a set of parents. From that day forward, even as an infant, you are in control of
your life. So let’s start from the beginning as a little bitty baby. When you are born about all you
do is eat and sleep. Not much controlling in that area is there. But let see, you go to sleep when
you are sleepy and your parents are grateful. This is an infant controlling their sleep times. The
favorite thing for and infant to do is eat. What do they do, scream to the top of their lungs until
they are fed and that is controlling at an early age infants. Day after day you get older and time
passes. During that time, you are making decisions ever moment of your life. Do you throw the
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ball at the window to see if will break or do you go away from the house so the baseball won’t
hit the window. The decision that you make at that moment will then determine the outcome of
the rest of the day. Throw the ball at the window and it breaks, then you get a spanking, then
grounded, and no more play time for the rest of the day. You don’t throw the ball at the window
and you go about the rest of your day with playing with your friends. Third option is you throw
the baseball at the window and the window doesn’t break. This is a small moment in life where
you think you are invincible, cool, or lucky. You just through a baseball at your window and it
didn’t break and all your friends think you’re awesome. That one bad decision to throw the
baseball at the window can lead you to make many more bad decisions thought out your life
because you think that you are invincible, cool or lucky.
Hereford states “You can either be proactive, or you can be reactive by allowing various
circumstances to call the shots”. After surviving your early years and you slowly starts to begun
your own life and the guidance and dependency of your parents fate, your decisions in everyday
life is what will determine the control you have in your life. Did you make the right decisions
that allow you to feel and that you have control or did you make the wrong choices and you think
that everyone or everything is holding you back and fate has just doomed you? The decisions
you make one day will most likely affect the outcome and future decisions you will have to make
later on down the road. Do you pay your bills on time or do you take the money to buy high
priced hand bags, because social media says you need that hand bag to fit in? Two months later
you have no electricity but you have a nice hand bags to put on Instagram so you will get your
likes and thumbs up. Do you drink and drive or get a cab? You choose to drink and drive, you
get pulled over, go straight to jail, spend 10,000 dollars on legal fees, and then lose your licenses.
Bad decisions lead to no control over your life because you are constantly trying to dig yourself
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out of a life of bad decisions. Most people really don’t look into their everyday good decisions.
You don’t waste your money, you pay your bills on time, don’t drink and drive, and you try to
live your life in a respectful manner. This is the start of being in control of your life.
Where ever you are at, in time it is always easier for you to look back and examine the
choices you have made. Either good or bad, time has passed and the decision has been made.
You either say you made the right choice and you are happy with your decision or you think
about what could have been if you would have done it differently. This is another moment in
time that the change can occur from your decisions. If you are not where you want to be, change
something. You might not know it at that time or understand it completely, but you are in
control. There are times that life may go good, even great, and then there are times that you will
be drag through the mud and maybe even feel like you just want to die. But at the end of it all,
you are in control of your life and the decision that you make will guide you throughout your
life. The feeling of control is ultimately your own. What you want in life, the outcome you seek,
do you achieve it by the decisions you are making?
Works Cited
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Dreher, D. (2019). How Much Control Do You Have in Your Life?. [online] Psychology
Today. Available at: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/your-personal-
renaissance/201404/how-much-control-do-you-have-in-your-life [Accessed 20 Jan. 2019].
Hereford, Z. (2019). Take Control of Your Life or Personal Leadership. [online]
Essentiallifeskills.net. Available at: https://www.essentiallifeskills.net/takecontrolofyourlife.html
[Accessed 20 Jan. 2019].