Marriage in our community is a legally binding union between two partners and it leads to the connection of two different families. people in my community marry when they feel that they have attained the right age to be married. My parents told me that today people are getting married at a more advanced age than in the past. The average age of getting married for men was 23 and 20 for women in the past but currently, the average age for men to tie the knot is 29 and for women 27. Marriage is not as important as it was in the past because it is no longer a sign of conformity but a choice that involved parties make.
My family’s experience of marriage relates to broader family trends discussed in the course. For example, my family members marry at will and a bit later in life, just like in the rest of the world. Many of the married men in my family married in their early thirties while the women wedded in their late twenties. One of the reasons for the mentioned trend is education. Many of my family members have attained a college education and have a stable source of income. Education shapes the way that individuals view the world thus they cease to be inclined to marry early. Moreover, due to education many women now hold well-paying jobs that empower them to be independent (Sussman, Steinmetz & Peterson, 1999). As such, they do not rush into marriage for financial security.
Marriage provides meaning and structure to the lives of the married members of my family. Married couples develop goals they want to achieve together, such as raising children, becoming financially stable, and integrating their families, among others. Once people enter marriage, they know they have to share the responsibilities that come with raising a family, such as finances and parenting. Working couples have to come to an understanding about who will take care of what chore in the home for them to contribute to the union. In our family, chores are divided based on availability, although gender also plays a role. My parents have a schedule that helps them run the various chores. Unlike in the past when the woman was expected to be the homemaker, men too have also taken up home chores to help their spouses and allow them too to take up careers. Sometimes, my father does the house chores while my mother works and settles some bills. My mother takes up these roles too. However, most of the time, especially when both of them are free, my mother does most of the domestic chores. As such, the two have a system that works for them.
Social class influences marriage trends in various ways. For example, educated and financially stable people view marriage as a choice. However, these individuals’ marriages usually do not last long for the very reason (having a choice) (Clarke-Stewart & Brentano, 2006). In my family, there are a few of my relatives who have divorced after a few years of marriage. Indeed, marriage is no longer a sign of conformity but prestige. Although my immediate family believes that married couples should try to work out their problems before they get a divorce, they also encourage leaving unhealthy and unhappy relationships. Social status has, therefore, affected the way that people perceive marriage.
I believe that my experiences about marriage will differ from that of my parents because the institution changes with time. My parents’ generation still views marriage as an important institution and a necessary rite of passage but my generation regards the union as a choice that they have to make at a certain point in their lives. I also believe that it is a choice, hence I will not enter the union unless I am sure I want it. I witnessed the parents of my friends get divorced and many of them have been negatively affected by it. For instance, some believe that marriage does not last. Moreover, some think that marriage is not necessary since it only seems to complicate life. Unusually, the mentioned union necessitates that parties involved not only sign legal documents that bind them but also cements a relationship between the two families. It is likely that the pressure that comes from society as well as the law after getting married leads people to separate (Folberg, Milne & Salem, 2004). I dread having failed marriage or putting my children through a divorce and I believe that will influence me to try to marry the right person and know how to handle disputes to avoid divorce. However, I will not hesitate to seek divorce if circumstances demand it. I do not think that I will get married before achieving my career goals. As such, I believe I will not experience marriage like my parents and other family members have.
Marriage is a union between two parties and in my community marriage is as common as it was in the past. However, people no longer wed as early as the previous generations and this can be attributed to the spread of education. Moreover, marriage today is not an important rite of passage as it was during my parent’s time since many people consider marriage a privilege and not a symbolic move. Divorce rates have increased since many people are not willing to stay in a marriage that no longer works. My generation will get married at a more advanced age than my parents’ generation since many of us are afraid of getting into a union which has a high probability of failing.
Conclusion
References
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Clarke-Stewart, A., & Brentano, C. (2006). Divorce: Causes and consequences. New Haven Conn.: Yale University Press.
Folberg, J., Milne, A., & Salem, P. (2004). Divorce and family mediation: Models, techniques, and applications. New York: Guilford Press.
Sussman, M. B., Steinmetz, S. K., & Peterson, G. W. (1999). Handbook of marriage and the family. New York: Plenum Press.
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